Killing me...

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As I awake from this plush king size bed where I lay my head get up  I look in the mirror and what do I see no piece of who I used to be...
This fame is slowly killing me
When I started out the best intentions I had all I wanted to do was perform to show everyone the joy I received from creating....
but now it's all mixed up and this fame is killing me 
I started doing things for the money instead. I wasn't happy unless from the top of my head to the soles of my shoes a designer label could be read. 
It's killing me 
This dream of a house I took it to far I live in a mansion for 15 and it's really only little old me....To tell you the truth I'm quite lonely but the people that once knew me have all gone away and the new friends I have aren't really my friends there here for the party never to stay...
It's killing me 
I once said "I'd never do that" but now you see me bowing my head taking off clothes for a pay check instead there's no one to check me I sent them away they were stopping my will "My way or no way at all" I boastfully say....
Man this fame is killing me 
I'm lost and I can't find my way so I buy all these material things to fill this void in this empty heart of mine 
its killing me 
I don't know how to get out my pride is stopping me who wants the whole world to see them fall on their face. I try to hide but there's always someone with a camera right in my face. At first it was fun but now since I can't hide from the camera I givem a show...
killing me
I don't want to give it all up money it's now my main goal but I know if I continue this killing will happen. Naw I don't mean to my natural body not that at all. I mean to my soul. There's almost no pieces left to save...
So I stand in this mirror unable to move hoping and wishing I can be saved
Cause this fame game I played 
It's strangled my soul my heart my mind my choices have lead me here today 
Fame has killed me nothing more said....

Shine Bright

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What can I say that will help me convey the greatness of my dear friend on this the day of his birth hmmm....


well first I must say he's nice beyond compare. But what really is behind those deep brown eyes and smile is a heart so sincere. See his heart reaches out were others would stop. He doesn't have to be in your situation to walk in your shoes. Understanding and listening also play a part. Laughter and joy mix in those to with a dash of gratitude. Creative ability one half of soultree as a team he makes bangin beats the kind that inspire. Only these things can come from the soul. So I'm glad I can call him a friend. Cause a friend true and true is exactly what he is. I can't help but convey on the day of his birth to express the appreciation I feel  towards that light that beams out from deep within shining so bright constantly blinding my eyes. So on this day day of your birth I wish you the best. I wish you to have all that you give and receive nothing less....


Loves 
Lizzy

2:45 a.m.

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This weekend was crazy busy! Friday morning I got up with my friend Uncanny at 2:45 in the morning to stand in line at Best Buy. It was cold and he was very impatient but we had a goal. We came for a PlayStation 3 and we were going to get it. I did the research the night before and knew if we got in line in time to get a ticket we were going to get one. I'm such a nerd when we got our ticket  started singing the Willy Wonka "I got a golden ticket" song. We even had good people standing around us in line. When the store finally opened at 5 a.m. we rushed in with everyone else and got the box headed to the counter to pay. It was literally that fast. We made it home by 5:30 a.m. simple smooth and fast. It was fun not a terrible experience at all.
Needless to say I'm fully enjoying the system and feel that I am now addicted to Little Big Planet truly one of the best games of the year. Its a game for everyone if you have a PlayStation you should most definitely get it.
 


I snapped some pictures of Uncanny enjoying his system. 



 



You should all check out Uncanny's music and blog attached are the links to his pages. Trust me you won't regret it....





http://twitter.com/Uncanny0728




After Thanksgiving

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Thanksgiving is not usually a tradition I enjoy.  I don't enjoy the tradition meal turkey stuffing and all that not for me. I am known to make jokes about how it's the day the pilgrims sat down and had a meal with my people before slaughtering them. I guess my issue with the holiday is that I've always felt I don't need a special day to show the people I love that I'm thankful for them. I feel I can sit down at any time and have meal with my family or friends without the pretense of holiday obligation but just because I feel like it. I realize this year after a wonderful time with family and friends this may not be the right thinking. I often think of the things I'm thankful for but I don't know if I express them enough. 
Reflecting one day as I started to walk around my local park I saw he beauty I don't usually take time to notice. I took this picture....
 
I was in such awe walking under the trees at that moment. My gospel music blaring from my headphones. Just thinking wow God made all this and place me here to see it. I really don't notice these things enough. So I too another picture....


 
As I took this picture I realized I have walked by this bike rack for most of my life. I have seen it's many different color changes and I'm really grateful for that. I'm happy to say I live in a town that is smaller than a big city but not completely empty of culture. I also live close enough to jump on a train to go to L.A. if I so chose. All this is a blessing! I think if I lived in the city I would find some trouble to get into.I've always said that I would relocate for love or if God sends me somewhere else. I can't help but hope that is a town like where I from. I live so close to my family and friends. Just this weekend I went to church on Thanksgiving day with my parents and a friend heard a beautiful message. Went home and made my chicken pasta 
 
enjoyed time with my other family. I got to talk to my sister on the phone for awhile pretty much about nothing but it was fun all the same. Throughout the weekend I got to see more friends and I've come to realize that all the people I spent time with little amounts or great I truly love and cherish. Whether they are blood related or not I feel a closeness to them and I love the place they hold in my life. Even though we can argue and fuss I am grateful that their here. Whether we speak every day or not. Honestly I could go on and on about the different blessings from God I'm thankful for so I'm going to stop here. 
One thing I will work on is how I express myself and showing more gratitude to those I love. For without you all my life would go on but would certainly never be the same.



Decisions

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Decisions.....

To me we are all a couple of bad decisions away from a life we could never see having. Yet somehow as a people we often forget and look down on people we think have lesser value. The truth is one bad decision leads to another and you can be that homeless person you scoff at outside the grocery store. Or the person in jail that doesn't really know how one night ended up so bad. One of the attributes of Jesus I feel we miss is his compassion. Time after time Jesus has compassion.
There is a bible story I hold very dear to my heart. It is of Mary and the alabaster box.
Luke 7:36
 36-39One of the Pharisees asked him over for a meal. He went to the Pharisee's house and sat down at the dinner table. Just then a woman of the village, the town harlot, having learned that Jesus was a guest in the home of the Pharisee, came with a bottle of very expensive perfume and stood at his feet, weeping, raining tears on his feet. Letting down her hair, she dried his feet, kissed them, and anointed them with the perfume. When the Pharisee who had invited him saw this, he said to himself, "If this man was the prophet I thought he was, he would have known what kind of woman this is who is falling all over him."
 40Jesus said to him, "Simon, I have something to tell you."
   "Oh? Tell me."
 41-42"Two men were in debt to a banker. One owed five hundred silver pieces, the other fifty. Neither of them could pay up, and so the banker canceled both debts. Which of the two would be more grateful?"
 43-47Simon answered, "I suppose the one who was forgiven the most."
   "That's right," said Jesus. Then turning to the woman, but speaking to Simon, he said, "Do you see this woman? I came to your home; you provided no water for my feet, but she rained tears on my feet and dried them with her hair. You gave me no greeting, but from the time I arrived she hasn't quit kissing my feet. You provided nothing for freshening up, but she has soothed my feet with perfume. Impressive, isn't it? She was forgiven many, many sins, and so she is very, very grateful. If the forgiveness is minimal, the gratitude is minimal."
 48Then he spoke to her: "I forgive your sins."
 49That set the dinner guests talking behind his back: "Who does he think he is, forgiving sins!"
 50He ignored them and said to the woman, "Your faith has saved you. Go in peace." 

To me not only do you see Jesus showing compassion but also love and forgiveness. Here is a woman that by standards of man is unforgivable and should hide in shame. Yet Jesus forgave her and gave her peace of mind. 
In my opinion we all fall short and my sins are no different then that of a town harlot. It's simply what is more socially acceptable. So as a people can we love the Jesus in the next person. You may not like their decisions and where they've taken themselves but the love of Jesus can bring them back. You can be that difference to show them how deeply Jesus has reached you. The simplest act can change a persons life. A simple smile a hello in passing noticing someone is hungry and coming out of the store with a sandwich for them. Shoot just sharing a meal if that's all you have. A common misconception is that only pastors have the power to reach another human being. So not true!!! Jesus lives in you!!! Each one reach one. You have that power placed inside of you to help change someones course. Give them the second chance Jesus gave you.
So I beseech you take care of those that need that extra care. Share the love of the Lord with them. Tell them Jesus loves them in spite of all their wrongs. Don't be ashamed of the knowledge that pulled you out from your fiery pit no matter how different the sin. Man sometimes a sin didn't even get a person in their situation were not the ones to judge were suppose to love.

For the Jesus in me LOVES the Jesus in YOU!!! no matter who you are, where your from, and what you look like.

"I'm Sorry"

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Have you ever took the time to think about the phrase "I'm sorry" and how people use it. I mean really people throw around those two words all the time. Something that I've always been hated for is the fact that i don't say im sorry unless I mean it. Even then I will often say I apologize I feel it's more sincere. I have had countless discussions with numerous people on this matter and realize everyone's view is different but it still bothers me.
One person told me that sometimes they say their "sorry" because the other person feels so bad. Really they say it to pacify them and to smooth over a situation. Another said that if a group of friends or family make them feel bad and tell them they should feel sorry then they say it. Lastly another told me they say it because it's second nature at this point they've grown up their whole life saying their sorry when offending others.
Now when I got these responses I have to admit I was a little baffled. I was taught that when you apologize to someone it should be out of a sincerity of heart with the purpose of not repeating those actions towards them. Thus the stubbornness of not apologizing until I truly mean it.
So these things had me thinking how many times have people just thrown those words at me to smooth over a disagreement??? Is it not okay to agree to disagree with another???  More often then not when you disagree with someone one party is offended that you can't see their point. But should that ruin a friendship???
To go a step further can "Sorry" really fix everything???

Far Far Away

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There is this one situation that keeps plaguing my dreams it's driving me crazy. There's nothing I can do now for it happened so long ago. But the dream ends in a future I don't believe will come true and at this point I'm really not sure if i want it to. It's funny how one action can alter a course. I can honestly say if I had it to do all over again that I would have never clicked send. I normally wouldn't think about this I don't like to live in the past. It's these dreams that keep bringing me back. These dreams are unreal nothing like present day. So why are they here I ponder away....
I just want this dream to go far away....
I feel like it's mocking me in the most painful way....
I just want this dream to go far far away...

Boyfriends Never "Boyfriends"

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I have perpetually had a group of boyfriends in the closest friendships a girl could ever hope for kinda way. But never boyfriends in the lovey dovey head over heels kinda way. I had a conversation with some women my age who seem to think this is very strange. I've never thought it to be strange but the jist of the conversation was how am I suppose to find a man if I have all these guys that are friends around. One woman flat out told me she didn't think it was normal or healthy for me to just be waiting for the perfect relationship. What I should be doing is shopping around that's what dating is for. I had my rebuttals and asked them about all the guys that they've randomly hooked up with that left them broken hearted. What kind of sense does that make??? Let me tell you this didn't help my case. To them it's experience for the next guy and i obviously must be hiding from rejection.
So this got me to thinking....What kind of sense does that make??? Hook up with as many random guys to gain experience for the next one till you find the man your suppose to marry. Or be a serial monogamous with guys you know its not gonna last with but hey it was "experience". In my world that seems a little strange. I was taught to wait for the man to find me by biblical standards that's what your suppose to do. But try explaining that to a group of 20 something women. 
It's not that I am waiting for the perfect man. That's not the case at all, I know their is no perfect man walking this earth. I just want someone that from day one although he may find me sexually attractive would be mentally attracted to me as well. I've come to realize I don't need a man in my life to tell me I'm pretty. My daddy told me everyday I was growing up till now. No! what I need is a strong man to have fun with. Someone who will cherish me as much as I'm going to cherish him. Someone that loves me in spite of my wrongs and will be willing to stick it out when I'm acting like a brat. Someone to lead me I won't mind following his decisions. Oh the list goes on....
If this makes me old fashion then so be it. Four of the most important women in my life three of which have be married at least 20 years. Have all told me there stories on how their marriages came to be. In all four cases all four women weren't even looking for a relationship. All for various reasons but still they weren't looking. Shoot they didn't even like their husbands at first meeting. But in the end they all have these great lasting relationships that haven't damaged them but help make them stronger. They are all truly with the mate God had for them. Looking at them helps my patients grow.
Bottom line I don't think I will start dating for "experience" no matter what my girlfriends say. I think the man that's for me will appreciate the fact I didn't shop around. And hey if that makes me a bit odd then so be....I'm just going to continue being me...

Internet Games...

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The games people play are very entertaining especially those on the internet. These games often remind me of some of the period movies I watch. For some reason in the ages of Duchess and Queens women and men alike would play all kinds of evil game. They often spoke about one another with a coy little smile and made power moves in setting their place in society. We are no different! Only now we have no decency we sit behind a computer screen and type words that most would never say to another persons face. We post sad little remarks about when a man or woman has hurt ones feelings. We delete or block each other when were mad. Women add each others profiles not because they actually would like to get to know her but because they want to see what's going on their page most of the time over a man. 
The sad part is a lot of people become paranoid and instead of enjoying the social networking site they signed up on they are worrying over who said what. Isn't this ludicrous??? While yes i enjoy being able to talk to those out of state or old high school friends. The games always put a sour taste in my mouth. Although I know they would exist without the internet sites there is something about someone telling you how they truly feel about you to your face. Or how about when you offended someone they would have to contact you by phone or in person to tell you. Even text messaging we often tell people things in text messages that should be said in a real one on one conversation. People are often shocked when I call and don't just send a text. Have you ever thought its because I would rather hear your voice then see a smiley face or a lol. In my opinion sometimes it just seems like a cop out. Its to protect oneself from rejection or really being themselves.
Although i have all these sites it makes me think if I did not have them how many people would seek me out just to talk or say hi. Not that many I could wager and a whole heck of a lot people wouldn't know my business. It would be a lot easier to avoid being slighted if I didn't participate. I must learn to get over the little jabs people make move on and truly laugh at how pathetic it is. Not all of it is easily laughed off.

I am notoriously know to be very apparent in my feelings and facial expressions. I am a all or nothing hot or cold kind of girl. If i don't like you you'll know. It's not something I am terribly proud of but it's me and I would rather be that way then faker then a three dollar bill.
So I am going to say this straight from my heart to yours. If you do not like me don't feel any obligation to. If you are somehow offended by my blog myspace facebook or twitter page simply block or delete me. You can write me a message or chose to do so quietly but to spread it around is just simply something I wouldn't do to you. I write what I want I post what I feel whether its right or wrong you don't have to look or like it. I actually enjoy a good discussion so if you would like to comment feel free. Just know I will respond the great thing about this world is we have free will choice and we can chose to agree to disagree if it comes to that. 
Bottom line is I don't do this for you I do this for me!!! I know I don't use proper grammar all the time and I write from a one sided point of view. I would not have it any other way for my pages are mine and truly reflect me. If I have offended in any way try bringing it to me as I would do the same for you. If you don't have enough courage for that then say la vie......

The Gossip the Pillow and the Knife...

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A woman named Belle went to lunch with a friend the conversation soon turned to the gossip that was going on in their small town. Belle's told her friend of another woman who's husband was cheating on her doing the most shameful things. Belle made sure to tell her friend make sure you don't tell anyone else but they both continued talking and having a chuckle because they were so sure that could never happen with their husbands. The two friends parted after lunch Belle told no one else but as for her friend she could not say the same. The gossip soon reached the mans wife and the family was soon after torn apart with the whole town watching.

Belle feeling terrible about what she herself had caused went to her priest to confess 
"forgive me father for I have sinned I have caused another pain by gossiping with another" 
the father's reply was "I want you to go home take a pillow and a knife go to the top of your building"
before the priest could finish his instructions Belle cut in "What! Why? What do you want me to do with that"
The priest patienly waited and said "I want you to take the knife and cut the pillow in half once you have done that return and speak with me" 
Not understanding fully why she must do this Belle held her tongue and went home to follow the priest instructions. Reluctantly she took a pillow off her bed a knife from the kitchen and took the stairs up to the roof. Thinking "This is crazy" she slowly lifted the knife and cut the pillow. Not really seeing the point Belle returned to the priest "Father I have done what you asked"
the priest asked "What did you see when you cut the pillow"
"Well feathers of course" Belle stated in a matter of fact tone of voice. 
The priest still being patient said "Okay then my child now I would like you to go collect every single feather that spilled out from your pillow"
Belle's face all a screw quickly replied "Well how on earth can i do that the wind has blown them all away"
The priest smiling said "Exactly neither can you take back the unkind words of gossip but you can remember the how fast the feathers spread and as soon as they were loosed you could never get them all back" 
the priest continued on "Now my child you may go you have learned your lesson but you must never forget the feathers"
As she had sat and listened a tear had slide down her cheek for she finally understood what had seemed so silly in the beginning all made perfect sense now. She could not control he fact that the woman's husband was cheating but she could control what she did with the information. Although she could not change the way this had worked out she from now on would remember the feathers.

Respecting Marriage and Relationships

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Seeing as we are living in the reality t.v. world I like most of my fellow Americans decided to join in on the viewing pleasure. Now matter what anyone could tell me I'm watching my shows. They are in a way my little guilty pleasures and only say this because there are those out there that choose to judge and say reality shows are trash (But that's another blog for a later time).Now one of my little guilty pleasures just happens to be The Real Housewives of Atlanta and I know several other people that enjoy this show and of course it always sparks a debate. Its all about the dislike of one housewife or another back and forth so on and such.
The main topic of discussion and dislike has often been around one woman Kim! for those of you don't watch she is a single mother of two girls and is dating a married man and quite frankly shes very open about it. This utterly disgusts me and I guess I assumed all woman would feel the same way I mean for gosh sakes shes sleeping with someone else HUSBAND!!! Kim often tries to reason away her blatant disrespect for as she calls him "Big Poppa's" wife by saying he's getting a divorce they don't stay in the same house she doesn't make him happy we've been dating for four years he's leaving her and countless other excuses. So with all that I automatically assumed  that most other women would feel this is so wrong. But quite the contrary many women my age thinks shes fab or saying she's trying to find love whereas most older women share my disdain.
This got me thinking why is that??? why do younger women and most of all single see that this relationship is okay. While older women mostly married feel the exact opposite. Well I think somewhere over the years women have lost a respect for other women. Its a common decency to respect another woman's relationship and marriage. I mean is it really that hard to check a man that comes at you side eye and smooth talking. Can you take a moment and make some logic out of the situation. He loved his wife enough to declare his love in front of family and friends and your only good enough for the bedroom. Sure he buys you nice gifts but that's to temporarily buy you into staying longer. More often than not he ends up staying with the wife anyways. Why go through the heartache pain and humiliation. To me makes no sense I would never want to cause another woman pain that I would never want to feel myself. Yes it does take two to tango but you have free will choice. Chose to say NO!!!
I can't lie I've know men that have cheated and that have gave me the side eye but I have a simple set of rules. That most of my single girlfriends seem to think are ridiculous but i stick to make sure there will be no misunderstanding of intentions.These also go for men in relationships (he's still taken ladies)


1. Never go anywhere alone with a man in a relationship this includes any form of meal or outing that the two of us are exclusively alone (i.e. shopping zoo picnics rite aid) the time he's spending with you at a meal should be time spent with his woman. The only approved place is church and that's it and even then its church then home you go to hear God's word fellowship with a group at church and dip out.
 

2.Never ever talk badly about the girlfriend or wife if a male friend decides to tell you about his hardships no matter how bad always  suggest ways for them to work it out keep it short and sweet the time he's spending telling you can be spent working on his problems with her. If you can't do that then simply don't weigh in. It never helps when you build yourself up like your this great woman that wouldn't do these terrible things to him. Not your place and there's always two sides to a story.


3.Make it a point to never text or call just for conversations sake. The only times its okay to call or text is birthdays,holidays,and deaths in the family. Also if your apart of a group of friends and need to tell a place and time to meet up if you have his woman's number its best to just go through her. Any other conversations are unnecessary there's no need to have a 3 hours convo with him he's got a woman for that already.


4.Never spend random money on him buying him gifts he may of mentioned he would like. No matter how big or small sends a message. We all know the appropriate gift times.


5. If his woman acknowledges something you did that offended her to you take the time to listen and within reason change your actions. We all know the intentions of our hearts check yourself. You may of heard unsavory things about her or seen something you didn't like but who really knows what he's doing behind closed doors. If you must get these feelings out vent to someone you trust to keep it confidential. Remember there must be a reason he's still with her. 

(bonus)6. If you know another woman close to you is dating or interested in a man steer clear no need to mess up a friendship just to prove your more desired or because you like the attention. Think of your friend or family members feelings she'll figure out if he's really that into her without your help. 



Now those are my basic rules I extend to men that are in relationships and married. I don't think there extreme I think they are set so there is no place for bad decision to be made. The truth is that most situations start out as innocent as can be by one person or the other and can lead to a very unproductive and unhappy place. Remember there is someone out there for you and he's single no need to tear apart lives and for your own personal gain and who's to say he won't do it to you. Just a little something to think about next time you run across a man that is taken.

Halloween the "Just for fun" holiday...

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Before i was born a path was chosen for me but now as i sit here at the age of 23 i stand by that path that was layed out before me. I have never celebrated Halloween never been trick or treating never craved a pumpkin nothing. The response i hear most often though is "how stupid its just for fun are you a Jehovah's witness???" and i always reply "no im Christian and i don't celebrate because of the true meaning behind every part of the ritual doesn't line up with what i believe" and more often than not i will hear someone tell me in 50 different ways that they don't believe in any ritual Halloween is just for fun. So I'm going to take the time to explain that although my mother decided well before i was born that i was never to par take in what others deem as harmless fun i choose to stand by that decision with every fiber of my being now as a adult.



Halloween Origins and Customs

traces Halloween back to the ancient religion of the Celtics in Ireland. The Celtic people were very conscious of the spiritual world and had their own ideas of how they could gain access to it - such as by helping their over 300 gods to defeat their enemies in battle, or by imitating the gods in showing cleverness and cunning.


Their two main feasts were Beltane at the beginning of summer (May 1), and Samhain (pronounced Sah-ween) at the end of summer (Nov. 1). They believed Samhain was a time when the division between the two worlds became very thin, when hostile supernatural forces were active and ghosts and spirits were free to wander as they wished.

"During this interval the normal order of the universe is suspended, the barriers between the natural and the supernatural are temporarily removed, the sidh lies open and all divine beings and the spirits of the dead move freely among men and interfere sometimes violently, in their affairs"
(Celtic Mythology, p. 127).

The Celtic priests who carried out the rituals in the open air were called Druids, members of pagan orders in Britain, Ireland and Gaul, who generally performed their rituals by offering sacrifices, usually of crops and animals, but sometimes of humans, in order to placate the gods; ensuring that the sun would return after the winter; and frightening away evil spirits.

To the Celtics, the bonfire represented the sun and was used to aid the Druid in his fight with dark powers. The term bonfire comes from the words "bone fire," literally meaning the bones of sacrificed animals, sometimes human, were piled in a field with timber and set ablaze. All fires except those of the Druids were extinguished on Samhain and householders were levied a fee to relight their holy fire which burned at their altars. During the Festival of Samhain, fires would be lit which would burn all through the winter and sacrifices would be offered to the gods on the fires. This practice of burning humans was stopped around 1600, and an effigy was sometimes burned instead.

Blending of Paganism with Christianity

When Christianity spread to parts of Europe, instead of trying to abolish these pagan customs, people tried to introduce ideas which reflected a more Christian world-view. Halloween has since become a confusing mixture of traditions and practices from pagan cultures and Christian tradition.

By A.D. 43, Romans had conquered the majority of Celtic territory. During their rule of the Celtic lands, Roman festivals were combined with the traditional Celtic celebration of Samhain. The Romans observed the holiday of Feralia, intended to give rest and peace to the departed. Participants made sacrifices in honor of the dead, offered up prayers for them, and made oblations to them. Another festival was a day to honor Pomona, the Roman goddess of fruit and trees. The symbol of Pomona is the apple and the incorporation of this celebration into Samhain probably explains the tradition of "bobbing" for apples that is practiced today on Halloween.

As the influence of Christianity spread into Celtic lands, in the 7th century, Pope Boniface IV introduced All Saints' Day, a time to honor saints and martyrs, to replace the pagan festival of the dead. It was observed on May 13. In 834, Gregory III moved All Saint's Day from May 13 to Nov. 1 and for Christians, this became an opportunity for remembering before God all the saints who had died and all the dead in the Christian community. Oct. 31 thus became All Hallows' Eve ('hallow' means 'saint').

Sadly, though, many of the customs survived and were blended in with Christianity. Numerous folk customs connected with the pagan observances for the dead have survived to the present.

In 1517, a monk named Martin Luther honored the faithful saints of the past by choosing All Saints Day (November 1) as the day to publicly charge the Church heirarchy with abandoning biblical faith. This became known as "Reformation Day," a fitting celebration of the restoration the same biblical faith held by the saints throughout church history.

Trick-or-Treat?

Some trace the origins of present day "trick-or-treat" to Samhain, which was the supreme night of demonic jubilation. Spirits of the dead would rise out of their graves and wander the countryside, trying to return to the homes where they formerly lived. Frightened villagers tried to appease these wandering spirits by offering them gifts of fruit and nuts. They began the tradition of placing plates of the finest food and bits of treats that the household had to offer on their doorsteps, as gifts, to appease the hunger of the ghostly wanderers. If not placated, villagers feared that the spirits would kill their flocks or destroy their property.

The problem was... if the souls of dead loved ones could return that night, so could anything else,human or not, nice or not-so-nice. The only thing the superstitious people knew to do to protect themselves on such an occasion was to masquerade as one of the demonic hoard, and hopefully blend in unnoticed among them. Wearing masks and other disguises and blackening the face with soot were originally ways of hiding oneself from the spirits of the dead who might be roaming around. This is the origin of Halloween masquerading as devils, imps, ogres, and other demonic creatures.

Others trace "trick-or-treat" to a European custom called "souling". Beggars would go from village to village begging for "soul cakes" made out of square pieces of bread with currants. The more soul cakes the beggars would receive, the more prayers they would promise to say on behalf of the dead relatives of the donors. At the time, it was believed that the dead remained in limbo for a time after death, and that prayer, even by strangers could guarantee a soul's passage to heaven.

In many parts of Britain and Ireland this night used to be known as 'Mischief Night', which meant that people were free to go around the village playing pranks and getting up to any kind of mischief without fear of being punished. Many of the different customs were taken to the United States by Irish and Scottish immigrants in the nineteenth century, and they developed into 'trick or treat'.

Halloween Comes to America

Traditional Halloween symbols (witches, black cats, pumpkins, candles, masks, parties and pranks) appeared in the U.S. during the late 1800's. In 1848, millions of Irish emigrants poured into America as a result of the potato famine. With this sudden influx of people, the holiday of Druidism found its new home on alien shores. "Proudly Celtic, they called Halloween Oidche Shamhna (`Night of Samhain'), as their ancestors had, and kept the traditional observances" [Common Boundary, Sep./Oct. 1993, p. 31].
The Jack-o-lantern is the festival light for Halloween and is the ancient symbol of a damned soul. Originally the Irish would carve out turnips or beets as lanterns as representations of the souls of the dead or goblins freed from the dead.

When the Irish emigrated to America they could not find many turnips to carve into Jack O'Lanterns but they did find an abundance of pumpkins. Pumpkins seemed to be a suitable substitute for the turnips and pumpkins have been an essential part of Halloween celebrations ever since.

Pumpkins were cut with faces representing demons and was originally intended to frighten away evil spirits. It was said that if a demon or such were to encounter something as fiendish looking as themselves that they'd run away in terror,thus sparing the houses dwellers from the ravages of dark entities. They would have been carried around the village boundaries or left outside the home to burn through the night.

Bats, owls and other nocturanal animals, also popular symbols of Halloween, were originally feared because people believed that these creatures could communicate with the spirits of the dead.

Black cats have religious origins as well. Black cats were considered to be reincarnated beings with the ability to divine the future. During the Middle Ages it was believed that witches could turn themselves into black cats. Thus when such a cat was seen, it was considered to be a witch in disguise.

Witches and witchcraft are dominant themes of the holiday. Witches generally believe themselves to be followers of an ancient religion, which goes back far beyond Christianity, and which is properly called 'wicca'. Witches are really just one side of a modern revival of paganism - the following of pre-Christian nature religions, the attempt to return to worshipping ancient Norse, Greek or Celtic gods and goddesses.

To witches, Halloween is a festival of the dead, and represents the "end and the beginning of the witches year. It marks the beginning of the death and destruction associated with winter. At this time the power of the underworld is unleashed, and spirits are supposedly freed to roam about the earth; it is considered the best time to contact spirits" (Halloween and Satanism, P. Phillips and J.H. Robie, 1987, p. 146).

The apostle Paul said Witchcraft is one of the acts of the sinful nature and those who practice it will not inherit the kingdom of God (Galatians 5:16-21; see also Revelation 22:15).

Divination

The various activities traditional to Halloween are mostly associated with the idea of obtaining good fortune and foretelling the future. Samhain was a time when it was customary for the pagans to use the occult practice of divination to determine the weather for the coming year, the crop expectations, and even who in the community would marry whom and in what order.


  • The idea behind ducking, dooking or bobbing for apples seems to have been that snatching a bite from the apple enables the person to grasp good fortune. Unmarried people would attempt to take a bite out of an apple bobbing in a pail of water, or suspended on a string. The first person to do so was believed to be the next to marry.
  • Samhain is a time for getting rid of weakness, as pagans once slaughtered weak animals which were unlikely to survive the winter. A common ritual calls for writing down weaknesses on a piece of paper or parchment, and tossing it into the fire.
  • There used to be a custom of placing a stone in the hot ashes of the bonfire. If in the morning a person found that the stone had been removed or had cracked, it was a sign of bad fortune. Nuts have been used for divination: whether they burned quietly or exploded indicated good or bad luck.
  • Peeling an apple and throwing the peel over one's shoulder was supposed to reveal the initial of one's future spouse.


  • One way of looking for omens of death was for people to visit churchyards, because the spirits of those who were going to die during the coming year were thought to walk around the churchyard during this night.

    Should Christians adopt such practices?

    Can we borrow pagan customs and superstitions of ancient peoples and "Christianize" them?

    As believers, we are called to
    "Test everything. Hold on to the good. Avoid every kind of evil. [1 Thesalonians 5:21-22] Who can deny that virtually all of the symbols of Halloween are evil? Witches, monsters, ogres, vampires, ghosts, ghouls, goblins, devils and demons all portray evil. Christians are to "... have no fellowship with the unfruitful works of darkness, but rather reprove them." [Ephesians 5:11]
    Is Halloween just another innocent holiday that doesn't harm anyone? Is it really just childish fun? Vandalism and wanton disregard for the property of others is common on Halloween night. Even normally well-behaved children are driven by unseen forces to destructive behavior. Police officials everywhere report a great increase in such activities on Halloween. Worse yet are the horrifying accounts of poisoned candy and fruits booby-trapped with razor blades and needles. Such threats are so real that many hospitals offer free X-rays of Halloween treats in order to prevent children from being harmed. Who but Satan could inspire such monstrous actions?
    Should the church be compromised by accommodating itself to the culture?
    "Do not conform any longer to the pattern of this world,
    but be transformed by the renewing of your mind." [Romans 12:2]

    "For what do righteousness and wickedness have in common? Or what fellowship can light have with darkness? What harmony is there between Christ and Belial?" [2 Corinthians 6:14, 15]
    When America and the world celebrates the Festival of Samhain and the powers of darkness by masquerading as evil creatures or decorating our homes, schools, businesses and churches with occult symbols, Satanic power is glorified.
    The sort of practices celebrated on Halloween are what defiled the ancient nations [see Leviticus 18:24-30]. The Israelites were warned against such practices when they entered the Promised Land, "When thou art come into the land which the Lord thy God giveth thee, thou shalt not learn to do after the abominations of those nations." [Deuteronomy 18:9]
     Let no one be found among you who sacrifices his son or daughter in the fire, who practices divination or sorcery, interprets omens, engages in witchcraft, or casts spells, or who is a medium or spiritist or who consults the dead. Anyone who does these things is detestable to the LORD, and because of these detestable practices the LORD your God will drive out those nations before you. You must be blameless before the LORD your God. The nations you will dispossess listen to those who practice sorcery or divination. But as for you, the LORD your God has not permitted you to do so. [Deuteronomy 18:10-14]
    As an alternative to the celebration of evil and death, Christians should rather do what Christians are supposed to do every day and that is shine the light of Jesus Christ. We should emphasize the Christian influences and strive to make Hallow's Eve a celebration of the acts of God through his people the saints. We should make it a day when acts of charity instead of vandalism and hatred abound. A day that emphasizes the light of Christ instead of the darkness of evil. A day when people meditate on the acts of Godly people instead of ghosts and goblins.
    While you may have participated "all in fun," be assured, Halloween is serious business for Satanists and witches. Those who oppose Christ are known to organize on Halloween to observe satanic rituals, to cast spells, to oppose churches and families, to perform sacrilegious acts, and to even offer blood sacrifices to Satan. While some may say, "But we only do this in fun...we don't practice witchcraft," those things that represent Satan and his domain cannot be handled or emulated "for fun". Such participation places you in enemy and forbidden territory and that is dangerous ground.
    Tom Sanguinet, former high priest in the Celtic tradition of Wicca (witchcraft) said "The modern holiday we call Halloween has its origins in the full moon closest to November 1, the witches’ New Year. It was a time when the "spirits" (demons) were supposed to be at their peak power and revisiting the earth planet." He went on to say, "Halloween is purely and absolutely evil, and there is nothing we ever have or will do that would make it acceptable to the Lord Jesus." [The Dark Side Of Halloween]
    As evil prevails, Americans have embraced an evil day of Satan, with the pranks of 'would be' hoodlums, combined with 'demon faces' on pumpkins, clothing of 'death' being worn, and calling it fun. When Christians participate in Halloween, it sends a message to children that witchcraft, demonism, Satanism, and the occult are something fun, entertaining and harmless.
    Many years ago, C.S. Lewis wrote that one of Satan's most deceptive tactics is to convince people that he doesn't exist. Apparently he has done a good job in his deception. Sadly, many people think of the devil as no more than a symbol of evil: like Santa Claus, he is just a fictional symbol. Many people today also do not think of witches as real people who practice magic, but simply as imaginary figures who represent the supernatural world and everything that is 'spooky.'

    Recognizing this pagan holiday gives the false impression that what is actually lethal is innocuous. Some children develop a fascination with the supernatural which leads them later into more sinister occult practices. It's the spiritual equivalent of painting a loaded gun to look like a toy and giving it to child to play with.

    It is the kind of celebration that encourages kids like the 16-year-old in Pearl, Mississippi who stabbed his mother to death in her sleep and then opened fire at his high school, killing two students and wounding seven. Authorities found this student along with at least six others involved in a small, avowedly satanic clique that calls itself "Kroth."

    How some people can defend this kind of activity as just another innocent holiday that doesn't harm anyone is beyond me.

    Light has come into the world, but men loved darkness instead of light because their deeds were evil. Everyone who does evil hates the light, and will not come into the light for fear that his deeds will be exposed. (John 3:19-20)

    Acceptance of the Supernatural

    Central to Satan's goals is the widespread acceptance of the supernatural, including the occult, on the part of North Americans, accompanied by a great revival of spiritism all over the world.

    Over the last 30 or so years, the occult has moved into the mainstream of America - in television, movies, magazines, business, and various aspects of daily life. Movies, books, magazines and encyclopedias of the supernatural have abounded. Turn on your TV and hear from the ever-present "Psychic Friends" hotline, or see lead characters in TV shows meet their "spirit guide." Entire bookstores devoted to the occult have become common. Universities regularly offer courses on witchcraft and magic - usually the so-called "white" variety. Myriads of mystical Eastern religions, bizarre and often demonic, have invaded North America and found in most cases an amazing responsiveness.

    Indeed, Halloween has taken root in America. Americans spend $21 million on Halloween candies yearly second only to Christmas in total sales. Halloween is the Number 1 season for selling humorous greeting cards. In North America, some 25 million cards are sold annually. (Peter Smith, "By the Numbers," The Toronto Star, 2002-OCT-27.) Halloween is the third-largest party occasion next to Christmas and New Year's Eve.

    Increasingly the curriculum in many public schools is becoming a primer in occultism.
     Impressions, a curriculum used in many school districts instructs teachers and students in how to cast spells. One teacher's manual reads, "Tell the children that a magician has cast a spell on some children. Have them work in pairs to write the magic spell the magician used. Have each pair write another spell to reverse the first spell. Have them chant their spells."

    About 16,000 school districts use the Pumsey the Dragon curriculum, by Jill Anderson. Many of the relaxation techniques used are identical to those used in hypnosis. Another curriculum called Duso the Dolphin employs relaxation techniques and sends hypnotized youngsters off on guided fantasies to a place called Aquatron.

    Satanism has become a phenomena that crosses the city limit into the rural areas of our nation. It is reported there are some 6000 witches, and approximately 10 million people are involved in the occult. However, it is very difficult to establish how many actually participate. These individuals are involved in a wide variety of activities from simply casting spells to human sacrifice. The news wires carry story after story about young children being kidnapped, only to be found later as victims of some bizarre ritualistic crime.
    As satantic involvement among our youth increases, we begin to see the primary goal of such activity. According to Scripture (2 Cor. 4:4; Rev. 12:9), Satan's goal is to deceive man by blinding him to the truth of the gospel and to receive worship for himself (Matt. 4:9; Isa. 14:12-14).

    It has become clear that the primary goal is to alter an individual's values and turn him against himself, his beliefs, family, God and society.

    "Be sober, be vigilant; because your adversary the devil, as a roaring lion, walketh about, seeking whom he may devour." (1 Peter 5:8)
    Young satanists believe the strong will rule with Satan. Once an individual becomes involved, they often make a pact with Satan. They commit themselves to a future date when they will take their own lives by suicide. They believe if they submit themselves to Satan in death, they will come back in another life as a stronger being and rule with him forever. According to recent statistics, fourteen young people a day take their own lives.
    Recently, a California skateboard manufacturer used a package enclosure similar in appearance to a gospel tract to encourage purchasers to sell their souls to the devil. The brochure titled, "Let's Make a Deal" has a smiley-faced devil who explains to Flame Boy what happened in heaven after he was banished: "First off, they set up a bunch of dumb rules, and then they imposed a really strict dress code. I'l wager that people must be quite bored up there, but hey, that's what they get for being good." He contrasts this with, "Flame Boy, even a dimwit like you can see that hell is by far the best place to retire. Just look at all the fun to be had." Children are asked to sign and return a contract, by which they give possession of their souls to the devil for eternity.

    What's wrong with Halloween?

    It does not have even one single redeeming virtue. It is custom born out of pagan superstition. It is a demon-inspired, devil-glorifying, occult festival. It is an evening holy unto evil, death, and divination. The Scriptures tells us to "Abstain from all appearance of evil." [1Thess. 5:22]
    Wake up Christian! This is the night of evil and those who love the Lord Jesus Christ should have nothing to do with it.
    We are all accountable for our choices and decisions. Ignorance is no excuse. The choice is up to you. Have you been involved in this satanic holiday? Do you struggle with giving it up because "it's just fun" and an innocent opportunity for children to dress up and collect candy? Don't take my word for it. Let God show you what he would have you do. You might begin by praying the following:
    Father in heaven I come to you in the name of Jesus Christ to confess that I'm a sinner. I'm sorry! Please forgive me. I believe with all my heart that Jesus Christ is Your Son and that You raised him from the dead. I believe that Jesus Christ died for my sins and that I might be saved. Each and everyday Father I turn my will and my life over to Your care, and may Your Holy Spirit lead and guide me in all the things I think , do and say. I'm Yours and You are mine. Father, please use me that I might help others come to know and love Your Son Jesus Christ. Thank you for saving me. Amen



Nothing to Say

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I have nothing to say...I've ran out of words to convey whats inside quite frankly I'm tired of laying it all on line and for what nothing to show for at this day and time is such a shame. I have had the words before the wherewithal to survive to push through to try and prove to you what i feel is true but no avail its gotten me...So now i stand her with nothing to say and I'm not asking if that's okay...

Oh how I LOVE the night!!!

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So of course im up late once again can't help myself can't rest my head. Thoughts linger that i just can't shake away. It would seem that as soon as the sun goes down and the rest of the world is preparing for bed that a spark awakens in me and there's no way im falling into a bed. When its dark i feel invincible i can do anything i love to joke if super villains were real id be one right along with Harley Quinn doing back flips and somersaults while the rest of the world has conformed to the "lights out" conspiracy. Just my crazy ramblings but then again i can't help but think of the many people that were judged for not being on a regular sleep pattern but then turned the world upside down with there genius....many a great song has been written and recored on a sleep less night.  I think ill stick to my love of the night and all it holds for me. Who knows i may have songs to write or book plots to start and there goes my imagination ready to start for there are somethings i simply can't accomplish by day there's just something about writing a song in a dimly lit room a candle flicking as your heart pours out those thoughts you can't shake those feelings that awake....oh how i love the night

imperfect girl in a imperfect world

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Im a imperfect girl in a imperfect world.....
all mixed up from my race to my habits. Im a all in or all out kinda girl i talk to much i cry i laugh i love i even hate sometimes...all things that just make up me but i wouldn't have it any other way. So Ive decided to start this blog to share my thoughts with this imperfect world whether right or wrong stupid or intelligent happy or sad just what i truly feel about my life and others. I implore you to take this journey with me you never know where we might end up at the end but i can most definitely guarantee
ill still be a imperfect girl in a imperfect world...